mitochondrial illness

Beriberi: The Great Imitator

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Because of some unusual clinical experiences as a pediatrician, I have published a number of articles in the medical press on thiamine, also known as vitamin B1. Deficiency of this vitamin is the primary cause of the disease called beriberi. It took many years before the simple explanation for this incredibly complex disease became known. A group of scientists from Japan called the “Vitamin B research committee of Japan” wrote and published the Review of Japanese Literature on Beriberi and Thiamine, in 1965. It was translated into English subsequently to pass the information about beriberi to people in the West who were considered to be ignorant of this disease. A book published in 1965 on a medical subject that few recall may be regarded in the modern world as being out of date and of historical interest only, however, it has been said that “Those who do not learn history are doomed to repeat it”. And repeat it, we are.

Beriberi is one of the nutritional diseases that is regarded as being conquered. It is rarely considered as a cause of disease in any well-developed country, including America. In what follows, are extractions from this book that are pertinent to many of today’s chronic health issues. It appears that thiamine deficiency is making a comeback but it is rarely considered as a possibility.

The History of Beriberi and Thiamine Deficiency

Beriberi has existed in Japan from antiquity and records can be found in documents as early as 808. Between 1603 and 1867, city inhabitants began to eat white rice (polished by a mill). The act of taking the rice to a mill reflected an improved affluence since white rice looked better on the table and people were demonstrating that they could afford the mill. Now we know that thiamine and the other B vitamins are found in the cusp around the rice grain. The grain consists of starch that is metabolized as glucose and the vitamins essential to the process are in the cusp. The number of cases of beriberi in Japan reached its peak in the 1920s, after which the declining incidence was remarkable. This is when the true cause of the disease was found. Epidemics of the disease broke out in the summer months, an important point to be noted later in this article.

Early Thiamine Research

Before I go on, I want to mention an extremely important experiment that was carried out in 1936. Sir Rudolf Peters showed that there was no difference in the metabolic responses of thiamine deficient pigeon brain cells, compared with cells that were thiamine sufficient, until glucose (sugar) was added. Peters called the failure of the thiamine deficient cells to respond to the input of glucose the catatorulin effect. The reason I mention this historical experiment is because we now know that the clinical effects of thiamine deficiency can be precipitated by ingesting sugar, although these effects are insidious, usually relatively minor in character and can remain on and off for months. The symptoms, as recorded in experimental thiamine deficiency in human subjects, are often diagnosed as psychosomatic. Treated purely symptomatically and the underlying dietary cause neglected, the clinical course gives rise to much more serious symptoms that are then diagnosed as various types of chronic brain disease.

  • Thiamine Deficiency Related Mortality. The mortality in beriberi is extremely low. In Japan the total number of deaths decreased from 26,797 in 1923 to only 447 in 1959 after the discovery of its true cause.
  • Thiamine Deficiency Related Morbidity. This is another story. It describes the number of people living and suffering with the disease. In spite of the newly acquired knowledge concerning its cause, during August and September 1951, of 375 patients attending a clinic in Tokyo, 29% had at least two of the major beriberi signs. The importance of the summer months will be mentioned later.

Are the Clinical Effects Relevant Today?

The book records a thiamine deficiency experiment in four healthy male adults. Note that this was an experiment, not a natural occurrence of beriberi. The two are different in detail. Deficiency of the other B vitamins is involved in beriberi but thiamine deficiency dominates the picture. In the second week of the experiment, the subjects described general malaise, and a “heavy feeling” in the legs. In the third week of the experiment they complained of palpitations of the heart. Examination revealed either a slow or fast heart rate, a high systolic and low diastolic blood pressure, and an increase in some of the white blood cells. In the fourth week there was a decrease in appetite, nausea, vomiting and weight loss. Symptoms were rapidly abolished with restoration of thiamine. These are common symptoms that confront the modern physician. It is most probable that they would be diagnosed as a simple infection such as a virus and of course, they could be.

Subjective Symptoms of Naturally Occurring Beriberi

The early symptoms include general malaise, loss of strength in knee joints, “pins and needles” in arms and legs, palpitation of the heart, a sense of tightness in the chest and a “full” feeling in the upper abdomen. These are complaints heard by doctors today and are often referred to as psychosomatic, particularly when the laboratory tests are normal. Nausea and vomiting are invariably ascribed to other causes.

General Objective Symptoms of Beriberi

The mental state is not affected in the early stages of beriberi. The patient may look relatively well. The disease in Japan was more likely in a robust manual laborer. Some edema or swelling of the tissues is present also in the early stages but may be only slight and found only on the shin. Tenderness in the calf muscles may be elicited by gripping the calf muscle, but such a test is probably unlikely in a modern clinic.

In later stages, fluid is found in the pleural cavity, surrounding the heart in the pericardium and in the abdomen. Fluid in body cavities is usually ascribed to other “more modern” causes and beriberi is not likely to be considered. There may be low grade fever, usually giving rise to a search for an infection. We are all aware that such symptoms come from other causes, but a diet history might suggest that beriberi is a possibility in the differential diagnosis.

Beriberi and the Cardiovascular System

In the early stages of beriberi the patient will have palpitations of the heart on physical or mental exertion. In later stages, palpitations and breathlessness will occur even at rest. X-ray examination shows the heart to be enlarged and changes in the electrocardiogram are those seen with other heart diseases. Findings like this in the modern world would almost certainly be diagnosed as “viral myocardiopathy”.

Beriberi and the Nervous System

Polyneuritis and paralysis of nerves to the arms and legs occur in the early stages of beriberi and there are major changes in sensation including touch, pain and temperature perception. Loss of sensation in the index finger and thumb dominates the sensory loss and may easily be mistaken for carpal tunnel syndrome. “Pins and needles”, numbness or a burning sensation in the legs and toes may be experienced.

In the modern world, this would be studied by a test known as electromyography and probably attributed to other causes. A 39 year old woman is described in the book. She had lassitude (severe fatigue) and had difficulty in walking because of dizziness and shaking, common symptoms seen today by neurologists.

Beriberi and the Autonomic Nervous System

We have two nervous systems. One is called voluntary and is directed by the thinking brain that enables willpower. The autonomic system is controlled by the non-thinking lower part of the brain and is automatic. This part of the brain is peculiarly sensitive to thiamine deficiency, so dysautonomia (dys meaning abnormal and autonomia referring to the autonomic system) is the major presentation of beriberi in its early stages, interfering with our ability for continuous adaptation to the environment. Since it is automatic, body functions are normally carried out without our having to think about them.

There are two branches to the system: one is called sympathetic and the other one is called parasympathetic. The sympathetic branch is triggered by any form of physical or mental stress and prepares us for action to manage response to the stress. Sensing danger, this system activates the fight-or-flight reflex. The parasympathetic branch organizes the functions of the body at rest. As one branch is activated, the other is withdrawn, representing the Yin and Yang (extreme opposites) of adaptation.

Beriberi is characterized in its early stages by dysautonomia, appearing as postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome (POTS). This well documented modern disease cannot be distinguished from beriberi except by appropriate laboratory testing for thiamine deficiency. Blood thiamine levels are usually normal in the mild to moderate deficiency state.

Examples of Dysfunction in Beriberi

The calf muscle often cramps with physical exercise. There is loss of the deep tendon reflexes in the legs. There is diminished visual acuity. Part of the eye is known as the papilla and pallor occurs in its lateral half. If this is detected by an eye doctor and the patient has neurological symptoms, a diagnosis of multiple sclerosis would certainly be entertained.

Optic neuritis is common in beriberi. Loss of sensation is greater on the front of the body, follows no specific nerve distribution and is indistinct, suggestive of “neurosis” in the modern world.

Foot and wrist drop, loss of sensation to vibration (commonly tested with a tuning fork) and stumbling on walking are all examples of symptoms that would be most likely ascribed to other causes.

Breathlessness with or without exertion would probably be ascribed to congestive heart failure of unknown cause or perhaps associated with high blood pressure, even though they might have a common cause that goes unrecognized.

The symptoms of this disease can be precipitated for the first time when some form of stress is applied to the body. This can be a simple infection such as a cold, a mild head injury, exposure to sunlight or even an inoculation, important points to consider when unexpected complications arise after a mild incident of this nature. Note the reference to sunlight and the outbreaks of beriberi in the summer months. We now know that ultraviolet light is stressful to the human body. Exposure to sunlight, even though it provides us with vitamin D as part of its beneficence, is for the fit individual. Tanning of the skin is a natural defense mechanism that exhibits the state of health.

Is Thiamine Deficiency Common in America?

My direct answer to this question is that it is indeed extremely common. There is good reason for it because sugar ingestion is so extreme and ubiquitous within the population as a whole. It is the reason that I mentioned the experiment of Rudolph Peters. Ingestion of sugar is causing widespread beriberi, masking as psychosomatic disease and dysautonomia. The symptoms and physical findings vary according to the stage of the disease. For example, a low or a high acid in the stomach can occur at different times as the effects of the disease advance. Both are associated with gastroesophageal reflux and heartburn, suggesting that the acid content is only part of the picture.
A low blood sugar can cause the symptoms of hypoglycemia, a relatively common condition. A high blood sugar can be mistaken for diabetes, both seen in varying stages of the disease.

It is extremely easy to detect thiamine deficiency by doing a test on red blood cells. Unfortunately this test is either incomplete or not performed at all by any laboratory known to me.

The lower part of the human brain that controls the autonomic nervous system is exquisitely sensitive to thiamine deficiency. It produces the same effect as a mild deprivation of oxygen. Because this is dangerous and life-threatening, the control mechanisms become much more reactive, often firing the fight-or-flight reflex that in the modern world is diagnosed as panic attacks. Oxidative stress (a deficiency or an excess of oxygen affecting cells, particularly those of the lower brain) is occurring in children and adults. It is responsible for many common conditions, including jaundice in the newborn, sudden infancy death, recurrent ear infections, tonsillitis, sinusitis, asthma, attention deficit disorder (ADD), hyperactivity, and even autism. Each of these conditions has been reported in the medical literature as related to oxidative stress. So many different diseases occurring from the same common cause is offensive to the present medical model. This model regards each of these phenomena as a separate disease entity with a specific cause for each.

Without the correct balance of glucose, oxygen and thiamine, the mitochondria (the engines of the cell) that are responsible for producing the energy of cellular function, cannot realize their potential. Because the lower brain computes our adaptation, it can be said that people with this kind of dysautonomia are maladapted to the environment. For example they cannot adjust to outside temperature, shivering and going blue when it is hot and sweating when it is cold.

So, yes, beriberi and thiamine deficiency have re-emerged. And yes, we have forgotten history and appear doomed to repeat it. When supplemental thiamine and magnesium can be so therapeutic, it is high time that the situation should be addressed more clearly by the medical profession.

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This article was published originally on November 4, 2015. 

Epistemic Closure, Carbon Cycle Feedbacks, and Mitochondrial Illness

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Patterns in life repeat across all ecosystems. We are nothing but circles upon circles of iterative patterns. It does not matter whether we are contemplating patterns of intellectual thought, behavior, or biology, the pattern and cycles of growth and implosion remain. When one circle collapses, another emerges, a little different but similar enough to be recognizable. In the early stages of a cycle, feedback loops are common, but in the latter stages and before collapsing, they become feedforward, endlessly escalating until collapse.

In feedback systems, inputs induce adaptive changes of accommodation. Think of how a thermostat controls heat. When the temperature rises, the thermostat feedbacks to the furnace to turn it off. Similarly, when the temperature cools, it signals the furnace to turn on. In a feedforward loop, there is nothing to regulate the temperature, so as the temperature rises, it would signal the furnace even higher. Most biological systems, excluding some hormonal cues, operate as feedback loops, up until a point. Feedback systems require energy to maintain; feedforward systems, not so much. When the energy runs out, input feeds forward and adaptive changes of accommodation escalate until the last and bitter end.

I was reminded of these patterns a few months back by two seemingly disparate observations: a twitter thread on the closed intellectual systems that feed upon themselves in political social media and a scientific article warning that the threshold for environmental carbon cycles where damage enters a feedforward loop is fast approaching. These, of course, come against the backdrop of my work on mitochondrial illness; perhaps among the clearest examples of cycles gone awry. Mitochondria, the comptrollers of cellular energy, are exceeding adaptable to existential threat. So long as the accounts are balanced favorably towards energy availability, systems keep running. When the energy runs out, however, what are meant as temporary adaptations with clear feedback mechanisms, become more permanent, forever escalating ill-health until the tissue, organ, and eventually the human in which they reside, collapse. Mitochondrial collapse, at its most basic level, is death. For without energy, not even breath is possible. Both the twitter thread and the Nature article reminded me of how perilously close we are to that collapse ideologically and biologically.

Of Collapsing Epistemes and Ecosystems

Some months ago, I stumbled upon a particularly prescient twitter thread that used the term ‘epistemic closure‘ to describe political social media. Briefly, an episteme is a Greek philosophical term that refers to the rules by which knowledge is determined and accepted e.g. how we know what we think we know. From a paper I wrote last year.

An episteme refers to a system of understanding that is, in many regards, codified culturally by the acceptance of others. Those who study epistemology are interested in understanding the conditions for, and structures of, knowledge as it applies to systems of thought like those employed in science, politics, or culture. In general, epistemology ask questions about how ‘truth’ is defined, who is allowed to speak about truth, and how these truths are disseminated. The how and the who of epistemic knowledge are important considerations when evaluating systems of thought as they are often deeply entangled in webs of influence that may or may not be clear to those operating within that system.

The gist: An episteme is like a circle; an open circle when it is healthy and a closed and shrinking one when it approaches collapse. Its rules define what those within that circle consider knowledge or truth, as well as by whom and how truth can be determined. It is important to note that each of us operates under these dictates of epistemic knowledge. We exist in these circles of cultural, religious, political, and other norms. In many regards, these circles provide the heuristic that allows us to navigate informational or belief systems by caveat and without thinking through the problems ourselves. The epistemic circle serves a biasing function that guides decision-making and it is a necessary survival mechanism. Success and even survival within a particular episteme requires us to abide by these rules.

Consider each of the groups that you belong to beginning with macro groups like country and religion down to the smaller groups like work and family. Notice that there are rules, some spoken, others not, about what each group considers acceptable knowledge or behavior; rules that if you want to succeed or survive, you must abide. Many of these rules are so entrenched that we have internalized them and no longer pay them any heed. They are there though and they mark the boundaries of the epistemes under which you live. Now consider whether those rules are healthy, whether there are mechanisms of feedback in place, of dissent or correction, or whether they are feeding forward and simply amplifying a particular power structure or ideology. With the former, there is opportunity for evolution. There are still rules and power structures, but dissent and growth are possible. With the latter, there is not. The episteme is approaching implosion.

Epistemic Closure and Feedforward Loops

If an episteme determines the rules by which truth and understanding are deemed acceptable, then epistemic closure would indicate a closed system of understanding; a closed circle. In the thread I mentioned above, the author was referring to a particular type of political media and to an ideological ecosystem that was not necessarily closed off from dissenting views but one with mechanisms in place that would not only allow for the active rejection of any and all contrary evidence or views, but demanded it. Within this system of epistemic closure, no matter what was presented there were mechanisms in place to ensure that rightness of one’s views could never be challenged, only magnified and reinforced. In this regard, all contrary evidence or ideas become proof supporting the certainty of a particular perspective. It was a feedforward loop. While this gentleman was referring to political ideology, it is difficult not to see the same processes involved in pharmaceutical marketing. Indeed, I would argue that the mechanisms of maintaining epistemic closure have a long and entrenched history in the pharmaceutical and chemical marketing. Think about how tobacco, vaccines, or really any drug or environmental chemical is marketed to the public; how dissent is not only squashed but turned around against the dissenter in a manner that strengthens the manufacturers message of safety and/or efficacy. Closed political systems hold tight to the tobacco playbook.

The second example came from an article published in the journal Nature about environmental warming, and specifically how warming affects soil based carbon cycles. The gist of the modeling presented suggested that we have only 2 more degrees Celsius of warming before we switch to an essentially feedforward loop of environmental destruction. The authors used the term carbon feedback to describe the situation, and the math used to model the phenomena was quite linear, but the data they presented were suggestive of a feedforward type of reaction, one where each new input strengthened the progression towards catastrophe; the point at which it would become impossible or nearly impossible to reverse course and the point at which the ‘energy’ required to flip back to a feedback system, was insurmountable.

In my work with mitochondrial illness, I see patterns like this regularly. Ideologically, mitochondrial illnesses are so complex that they defy our current epistemic understanding of what illness looks like, and as a matter of course, those within the epistemic bubble that is modern medicine, decry their very existence. These illnesses are attributed to psychosomatic origins, filed in the ever expanding ‘all-in-the patient’s-head’ category. The reasoning is such that if an illness does not respond to an available medication, and often a laundry list of medications, it must not be real. The non-response becomes the proof, a proof that is constantly reinforced and magnified with each new failed treatment. Much like the closed political ideologies, no amount of evidence will convince the ‘inside-the-circle’ group of what veracity of the ‘outside-the-circle’ group sees or experiences. In no small part due to decades long information campaigns touting the benefits of this particular medical ideology, all evidence from the out-groups serves only to reinforce the beliefs of the in-group. It is a collapsing circle.

Climate change follows the same pattern. Its causative factors, the pervasive use of toxic chemicals that overwhelm the ‘environment’s’ ability to effectively manage these insults, follows the same pattern of collapse we see in human mitochondrial health. Both are prefaced on the notion that all we need are better chemicals. Indeed, the entirety western health, whether it is human or environmental, relies upon on the notion that not only are these chemicals rarely deleterious to health, but they are necessary for health. As with the political groups, those within the circle of the current medical paradigm never see the problems with chemical toxicities, except within the narrow confines of anaphylaxis. When chemical toxicities appear, a more open circle episteme would address it and correct accordingly. A closed circle, a settled science, sees only the need for another chemical. Damage is not indicative a failure or a cue to readjust but rather reinforces the belief that the answer resides in what we already know – more chemicals.

That is where we find ourselves now, in a closed circle, endlessly reinforcing our own beliefs about health, the environment, politics, and culture, coming perilously close to the collapse of each.

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More people than ever are reading Hormones Matter, a testament to the need for independent voices in health and medicine. We are not funded and accept limited advertising. Unlike many health sites, we don’t force you to purchase a subscription. We believe health information should be open to all. If you read Hormones Matter, like it, please help support it. Contribute now.

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Image credit: Bike parking lot. Free public domain CC0 photo. ID : 6040888

This article was published originally on March 1, 2021. 

Sick, Deaf, and Uninsured: The Nightmare of American Healthcare

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Lifelong Hearing Loss

At the age of nine years old, I was diagnosed with progressive sensorineural hearing loss. At that time, I already had a 60% loss in the high tones. No one knew I was deaf because I had adapted and learned to lipread. I suspect most people I encounter these days don’t realize how deaf I am. I have had hearing examinations where the audiologist thought something was wrong with their equipment because I am so deaf I don’t hear most of the tones. My speech comprehension goes down about 50% when the audiologist covers their face with a piece of paper. I was recently tested and my loss has progressed from the “Moderate to Severe” category to “Severe to Profound”. Without hearing aids the world is a very quiet place.

Unprepared to be Uninsured

For the whole of my adult life, healthcare and insurance were not things I worried about. My first husband was in the military, so on those rare occasions I needed a doctor, I saw whoever was on shift at the base clinic. When I was pregnant with both my children, an Ob/Gyn was assigned to me and then I saw whoever was on shift when it was time to give birth at a military hospital. When I went to work for a city government, I had health insurance and doctors were assigned to me sort of magically. For much of the time I had health insurance, I didn’t even make the deductible. I was completely ill-prepared to join the legions of the uninsured in 2010 when I had to take an early retirement from my civil service job.

Phone Impaired in the Age of Smart Phones

I was last able to use the telephone on a limited basis in 2009. Even though I had a special amplified handset on my work phone, I sometimes would get a call and be unable to understand anything the caller was saying. I had to hand the phone to a co-worker when that happened.

Now that I don’t have an amplified land line, I cannot use the phone at all. What calls get made, my husband has to make or take them for me. He has auditory processing disorder and is likely high functioning autistic as well as ADHD. So phone calls take a lot of energy on his part and I don’t ask him to make them unless it is absolutely necessary.

One of the things I think many people may not be aware of is that many, if not most, healthcare practices do not accept uninsured patients. This is especially true of specialist like GI and endocrinologists. I don’t blame them, I cannot pay medical bills unless they are given to me in a manner that I can plan for and afford while still paying upfront for ongoing health care, medications, and supplements. Not being able to use the telephone to call multiple practices to inquire about their patient acceptance practices and to get cost information upfront makes it nearly impossible for me to get services I need even if I have funds to pay for them.

The High Cost of Not Knowing

After retiring early without health insurance, I managed to get by for three years without any healthcare.  When I started having chronic diarrhea, I looked around online to find help that I could afford. That information was not obtainable without a phone, so I wound up in the local university hospital ER with a blood pressure of 240/130. We owed no one when we walked in the hospital doors and now we had debt more than a small house would have cost. I remember lying in bed in a haze and crying because I felt I would never again own a home of my own.

Ironically, the event that I believe triggered my hypertension was related to an unscheduled “invasion” of our duplex by appraisers. One of the reasons I need a home of my own is that I don’t feel entirely safe in a rented home. It is a subjective thing and I have been at loss to explain it until I started learning about autism.

During the four day hospital stay, I filled out an application for financial assistance, but since I still had money in a retirement savings account, my application was denied. I did not feel I should take the money out of that account because I was saving to buy new hearing aids. The ones I was wearing were over 10 years old.

I considered trying to pay the hospital $20 or $30 dollars a month to preserve my tattered credit rating, but I received about a dozen bills, none I could afford. One was for $47,000 (that was already discounted 60%) from the hospital. Several were for $2,000-to 3,000 and numerous in the hundreds from various entities like labs, catering, and doctors. There were even separate bills for the emergency room. There was no way I could pay all of them even at $10 a month. We were living payday to payday with little remaining. Since I could not pay all of them, I did not pay any of them. I was used to paying my bills on time and so consciously deciding not to pay these bills caused me a lot of distress. I still had undiagnosed and complicated health problems that needed ongoing care. I had no idea how I was going to pay for that.

Hostage to the System

I was referred to a local health clinic and I paid for that out of my income tax refund, which I had decided to park in a savings account to pay each years’ ongoing medical expenses. When I was referred to a rural GI practice, my husband’s mother gave us several thousand dollars to help pay for it. This experience was another nightmare. The rural GI was treating thousands of low-income patients and he had, at most, 15 minutes of time with us. He spent most of that time entering data into a computer. This was a problem for me because I need people to face me in order to be able to lipread. I explained that repeatedly, but he either forgot or ignored my request.

I was having ongoing diarrhea, digestive issues, and malnutrition when I was referred to the GI. I did not feel it was safe to protest or be overly assertive with this doctor, as I desperately needed his services.  His lack of accommodation for my deafness was only part of what made this experience so upsetting. He seemed to have no understanding or concern for our financial issues. Even though we explained our financial situation, he ordered a litany of expensive tests. I could not get anyone at the clinic to tell me how much things would cost upfront. Even his office visits were a problem. I asked about cost and explained I was uninsured at the time of the first office visit. I paid the $179 they requested up front, but then they would send me additional bills for $79 with no explanation. The total of all the tests including endoscopy and colonoscopy, CT scan, etc. was somewhere around $8,000-9,000. I think we paid 4 or 5 thousand up front from money my mother-in-law gave us. Again I didn’t get one billing entity, but a 1/2 dozen or so different bills. So that was yet another hit to my already miserable credit rating.

I continued to suffer digestive issues even on the prescription enzymes and PPI.  Since the doctor declined to address several of my health concerns that he didn’t feel were GI related, I was disinclined to go see him again. It was only when we finally got two incomes that we were able to afford an allergist. I was diagnosed with 44 food allergies as well as multiple environmental ones.  The allergies were the cause of the  digestive problems that the GI refused to evaluate. That was another three years of my life needlessly lost to digestion related malnutrition.

New Type of Primary Care

I recently changed from the local corporate clinic to a new type of family practice two hours away. The family practice seemed like a good deal as they had lower costs for lab work and a monthly fee with $20 an office visit charge. They also had a patient portal which seemed ideal for me since I could write about my problems instead of trying to relay them via my husband over the phone. After two visits at $180 a piece, I had problems because they didn’t seem to want to hear about any of the problems other than the type 2 diabetes. When I managed to get them to understand the full range of my health problems, they unceremoniously dumped me via email. They referred me to a nutritionist who strung me along two weeks before declining to take me as a patient because I could not do consultations on the cell phone.

This dumping echoed a lot of childhood experiences of rejection so it was traumatic enough that it made me cry. It has been increasingly hard for me to put my trust in healthcare professionals since the death of my second husband to colon cancer. They were not the cause of his death but there was a lot of needless suffering along the way. This opened my eyes to problems in our healthcare system I was previously unaware of.

Fairly frequently in the past eight years, I have felt a sort of despair that is like being trapped in an emergency situation with no way to call out for help. Some of this stems from a lifetime trauma coping strategy of submission and some of it is due to poor communications skills on my part. I can never know how well I will be able to articulate the thoughts in my head. They seem so clear to me but somehow come out confused and garbled when I am stressed. I have to do a lot of meditation and exercise to calm down HPA activations just prior to a healthcare visits. I arrive at my appointments with as much written down as I can manage because stress causes me to lose even more communications abilities.

Direct Primary Care

I finally had a bit of luck when I found a Doctor of Internal Medicine who has a Direct Primary Care practice. I had almost disabling anxiety in the weeks up to my first visit because I was afraid if I told her too much about my problems she might refuse to take me as a patient. Fortunately, she was honest, blunt, and straightforward in a way that alleviated my anxiety. I focused on my official diagnosis and getting medications refilled on our first visit. On the second visit, I wanted to focus on the undiagnosed problems. Thanks to Chandler Marrs for editing and publishing my story here on Hormones Matter, I feel I have been heard and understood. As a result, I now have referrals to an endocrinologist, a GI, and a contact to get evaluated for High Functioning Autism (HFA).

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More people than ever are reading Hormones Matter, a testament to the need for independent voices in health and medicine. We are not funded and accept limited advertising. Unlike many health sites, we don’t force you to purchase a subscription. We believe health information should be open to all. If you read Hormones Matter, like it, please help support it. Contribute now.

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